to whom it may concern,

(maaf zahir & batin)


as for the rest of you,
enjoy the long weekend.

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

you know what ...
somebody "up-there" - really - really - really does love me.
heeeeee...

ok.. if u've been reading my blog, u'd know that one of my christmas wish list is THIS. (For those who malas to click on that.. its the book that i've been looking for years now..)

"The Confession of Max Tivolli by Andrew Sean Greer".

*** hint hint ***

so, what happen if someone make a movie out of it (or at least similar to it) and make brad pitt as the main actor?

well, this is what happen.



another reason why i shouldn't die this year.

damn.

Footprints

One night a man had a dream.

He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord.

Scenes from his life flashed across the sky
and he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand,
one belonging to him

and the other to the Lord.

When the last scene of his life had flashed before him,
he recalled that at the lowest and saddest times of his life
there was only one set of footprints.

Dismayed, he asked,

"Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you'd walk with me all the way.
I don't understand why,

when I needed you most,
you would leave me."

The Lord replied,

"My precious child.
I love you and I would never leave you.

During your times of trial and suffering
when you saw only one set of footprints...

That was when I carried you."

Mamma Mia!!!

i love ABBA.
i mean, whats not to love?

so, needless to say, we went last night. our Mr Ex-Bond actually sang. now, how did that happened? i dun think he would be making any album soon though, but he'll do. but it totally ruin my bond image of him.

it was an all-right movie. considering its musical and all.

what i couldnt stand is that halfway through, im realizing that the whole cinema was singing along with the movie. it doesnt help that im sitting beside this old man whom is obviously lost in his memory lane and doing his karaoke-ing like nobody's business.

by the end of the movie, he made a point that he actually came from that generation. like i dunno that already!! but some people just love to point what is obvious.

what surprises me was that the censorship people doesnt really do their job this time. not that im complaining. no - not porn scene people. its just that - im amaze that in this particular country where someone was banned from live tv for showing his bare chest - that they can allow full naked adult backside and all its glory to be shown in cinema where kids are around. no front frontal. but with all these current controversy about "getting jiggy with it" of the same XY chomorosome, im just surprise.

how could i not?

but, everybody in the cinema was laughing their head off.. or should i say, their butt off??

having said that, this is totally one show not to be missed.

just one thing, how could they turned Mr Darcy into gay?
damn.

Accuracy of Death

Takeshi is damn hot..
dun u think?





wud u mind dying?
i wouldnt.

Just Thinking Outloud..

"Is it really possible that i would never see him again? As the years went on, I cant help wondering - if only in passing, whether that was it. As far as me and him were concerned. A brief period of togetherness - followed by nothing forever..."
- Only Love, Erich Segal (if im not mistaken!)

My whole life, i never really did believe in goodbyes.

Death aside - I just could not accept the concept of two people - who once meant 'something' to each other - to ever see one another for the rest of their lives. Its just unacceptable and not to mention, unthinkable.

Not to say that i did not wish so.

Only GOD knows how much i wanted to last see that person's back. putting an end to that part of my life. but weird as it sounds, its just impossible! it's either I find my way of reaching them.. OR they find their way to me.

Either way, it feels like fate (or through plans or coincidences :)) seems to work out the way or path or whatever you kids call it nowadays.

which is strange, i guess. its almost as if fate does not allow me to a real goodbye.

was there something fate is telling me?
or did i subconsciously give my instructions to fate to let our path cross again somewhere down the road?

finding them again, is it an act of retributional?
or purely vengeance?

i wonder.

Seriously...

good for them.

know wat.. sometimes i question my 'preference'...
just a tot.

:)

Analyze This.

someone once told me not quite so long ago...

"you analyze everything..."

and apparently, its NOT a good thing.

how do you tell someone the reason behind all these analyzing?? i mean, how could i not analyze every single thing? if analyzing gives me something to hold on to? for something to somehow looks like its in my favour (though in reality its not), how could i not? i am allowed to make me happy yes?

no??
huh??

sometimes i do tend to project that i live in my own la-la-land but i am in touch with my reality more than what i let others thought. sometimes i said things that doesnt make sense at all - but maybe, i was just shouting for some re-assurance that some things are not as make-believe as it seems to be.

like now, for instance, i dont make any sense at all to most who read this. but it makes sense to me, and maybe it makes sense to someone too. did i really read too much into it? or was there alot of things to be read about? or should i just stop reading?

really, sometimes, the whole thing doesnt make sense at all and thus, i will go on analyzing about stuff that is so beyond what my mind can comprehend.

am i making any sense at all??
nah??

well, that's the idea.
coz, sometimes i dont even know what im talking about.

hmmmm...

whatever.

What A Feeling..

i've been hearing this song in my head the whole day - singing to myself in the office when i knew no one's listening. and i cant get it out of my head.
i mean, i tried singing other song but it just doesnt work!! damnit!

so thought i'd share it with you. im not sure why though.
but wat the hell, this is afterall, MY blog.
heeeeeeeeeee.... ;)

---------------------------------

First - when there's nothing
But a slow glowing dream
That your fear seems to hide
Deep inside your mind

All alone - I have cried
Silent tears - full of pride
In a world made of steel - made of stone.



Well I hear the music
Close my eyes - feel the rhythm
Wrap around - take a hold of my heart

What a feeling - bein's believin'
I can have it all - now I'm dancing for my life

Take your passion
- and make it happen
Pictures come alive
- you can dance right through your life

Now I hear the music
Close my eyes - I am rhythm
In a flash it takes hold - of my heart

What a feeling - bein's believin'
I can have it all - now I'm dancing for my life

Take your passion
- and make it happen
Pictures come alive
- you can dance right through your life

[performed by: Irene Cara]
ost Flashdance

Breaking Fast

i dun fast. but it doesnt stop me from breaking fast with the rest of my colleague. i love food. and it shows. physically.

so thats not good.

my boss organised a majlis berbuka puasa @ Sime Conv. Ctr somewhere at Mont Kiara just now, seeing that majority of his staffs are malay. i made my move somewhere around after 6pm after receiving a call from my colleague at 6pm saying that she's already there.

aiks.. she must be very hungry already.

when i reached that place, it was already 645pm. the table is full of foodssss. so, i took just 1 plate - filled it with li'l bit of everything from the buffet that seems inviting and one soup. thats it.

"tu jer?" my colleague asked.

so we sat there... and i was like, "takpe kan if i makan dulu?? braper jam lagi nak buker ni??"

(psstttt... mind the language.. muahahhaha)

another 15mins to go.. damn it.. the food looks inviting and yet, i dun wan to be rude and start attacking my dinner. can i?? is it rude? im not sure of the protocol here. but i decided to wait.

there's nothing much i can do but wait. so, had to do something. take pictures lor..

just ONE word. Y.U.M.M.Y!!!

after kenyang.. then i go back to taking pictures of everybody.

so, let me introduce you to some of my colleagues that makes my daily life a living hell. haha. no-lah.. these are the people who get to see me banging the phone after being shouted at by clients. who heard me mumbling "kabret" every now and then. who get to hear me raising my voice to whomever it is at the other line (not client tho) trying to get the deal done NOW rather than next year. who get to see me eating ice every time. who understands how important coffee is to me early in the morning. who never take not even 1 ice from MY ice tray coz its basically my life when im in the office. who calls me every time their computer do something weird.

yeah these are the people.

(above pic) the one with the white scarf. i always asked her, "bila nak issue gaji ni?? tak buat kerja ker??" mind you. its only mid-month. hahah..

(above pic) our new reception. call me with a "Kak" infront my given name. always wanted to correct her. dun call me kakak!! feel so old.. and im not that OLD mah..

(above pic) the one at the far left. even when she's on MC, u can sometimes see her in the office. siti nurhaliza's biggest fan.

(above pic) the lady in pink scarf. she's always calm and cool even if the expire date is tomorrow. i cant imagine how she does that. she must be getting sick getting my intercom every now and then, "bank dah release ker??? apasal belum??" hahha

(above pic) one who assist me in doing all the dirty job. picking up calls that i dun wan to pick up. she calls me cranky!! haha. u always see her running her and there like cartoon. it doesnt help that i tend to give her 10 files and say, "urgent ah..." .. pity her..

(above pic) she tends to pile up all her correspondence and gimme at one go.. and i always ask, "penting ker?? u nak kejar dispatch?" her answer would determine when i would actually sign all the correspondence.

(above pic) our attachment std. just finished her 1st year. and so eager to learn everything law has to offer. aghhh. im so jealous. i wish im in her shoe. just starting everything.

(above pic) one of the new addition. she's quiet in the office. very polite. always curi her pen from her table seeing that its the nearest to the fax. and she always ask for it back. whooppss... :)

(above pic) the one in blue. one of the outspoken ones in the office. can get along with just about anybody. u just have to spend one minute with her, and already she's treating you like an old friend. but dun try to cross her. never a good idea.

(above pic) mr and mrs big boss. the nicest boss i've ever had during my entire working life. never give me a hard time and im trying my very best not to give them any headache. though i think i did a few times. i cant imagine giving them my resignation letter one day.

(above pic) my other mr boss. rarely see him in the office though and rarely had dealings with him. few times so far. he would usually look for my other colleague in blue (see above pic) to give instructions. very soft spoken - in a man way.

2 bosses and 2 colleagues of mine didnt show up.

yeah.. this is the longest firm i've stayed with so far. im lucky this time to find a place i love to work in and where im comfortable. its just the line itself that im not happy with. everyday i found a new white hair due to demanding clients. but i just dont have the heart to leave just yet. until im offered that "phone number" salary. this is where i'll be.

hihi.

well... thats about it..

see how hungry some people are??

damn..

Mr Maybe.

i was having coffee with client just now. married couple with 2 kids. both around my age. and what i love about them is they are so loving to each other. with each other.

not those irritating high pitch voice calling each other baby or those who cant keep their hands off each other.

they are just - loving.
he respects her.
she respects him.
they hear each other out.
argue at times.
agreeing at times.
they are basically equal.
and i sit there and tell my self..
this is what love is all about.

i have been in a relationship where one person is more dominant than the other. sometimes its me and sometimes its them.

what im realising now is that, my past relationship was stronger and longer when i have the upper hand. or when i let it be on their terms 24-7. and it was those times when im the one who got out - and it was never the reason that i dont love them. yes - i do love whomever i was with in the past.

i just happened to love someone else more.

but life can play you back. the person u tot u in love with may never feel (as much) the way u do. so, yeah, i got burnt. served me right for letting good things get away.

really?

people questioned me before, why am i still single? what am i waiting for?

im not sure why or what. im clueless.

truthfully, when u give ur heart to someone - its rarely that u ever get it back. so, maybe that's y. maybe im still in love with that same someone who i fell in love with a LONGGGG time ago.

maybe.

relationship after that seems like passing time til the next real thing comes along. after a while, i feel like its pointless to be in a relationship for the sake of being in one.

maybe.

with me, its the little thing that counts.

so, watching this couple, i suddenly have this list blinking in my head - the idea of my perfect guy. there's no such thing. but wouldnt it be nice?

here goes.

• one who makes my heart stop beating.
• one who makes my heart goes 500 miles/hour.
• one who laughs with me (rather than at me) when i did the silliest of stuff.
• one who can just let me ramble on a subject that doesnt make sense without rolling his eyes.
• one who knows that the smallest thing i did for him is the biggest thing.
• one who kisses the side of my forehead while watching a movie.
• one who looks at me accross from a crowded room and wink - acknowledging my existence.
• one who hold my hand while driving (automatic car!!) and kisses it.
• one whom is not embarrassed to introduce me to his family & friends.
• one who search for my hand even when he's sleeping.
• one who can stand my unruly hair.
• one who doesnt judge me.
• one who calls me by my given name in their own weird pronounciaton and tone.
• above all, he must loves me.

see - not hard at all.

u this guy? email me now.

haha.

so.. enuf of this relationship talk. its giving me headache.

need to sleep it off now. ish.. had to get up in 1 hour for the majlis berbuka puasa - office function though i dunno why i should show face when ive been eating like a pig the whole day.

ok la.. off i go.

Award??

yeah.. i received an award...
now.. how did that happend?

thank you Catwoman and Nyonyok.

o well..

- clap - clap - clap -

somemore people.

clap - clap - clap.....

hmmmm...

truthfully, i dunno how this award thingy works. do someone just simply award someone for the sake of awarding someone or does one really deserves an award.. not that im complaining.

but it was sweet of Catwoman for including her brief reasons why i was awarded by her. its a rare day when someone liking ur blog. coz i see my blog as a way of achieving my social interaction quota since i dun write or keep in touch with anybody anymore. so im hoping this should do it on a mass level. and yeah, im trying to make a living out of it too. hahhaa.

NUFFNANG!! do your thang bebeh..

i will try to post the award soon. not now as my laptop is slowwwwwww... so, its not like im not accepting it.. and i keep on getting the invalid url when i tried posting the award here. and im in a hurry at the moment.

meeting up client soon and havent even mandi yet. it's gonna be a long day today - one thing after another.

so, who am i awarding?

damn. really people. if u r in my blogroll/list... that is an award already.
there are reasons why u r there to begin with. and not to make my list long.

errr.. there are rules????

sorry. i dun live by the rule.
never did.

:)

over and out.

Black (ISNIN) 2.0

how did someone knew that the market would crash 2 months prior to the date? and actually cited the actual date (15 September 2008) of it happening. was it planned? or was it just one big conspiracy theory?

he was already being discussed back in July 2008. most were saying, 'yeah yeah...' or somewhat effect. i gathered from the forum - he was since banned. from what? i have no idea. lifted since?? also no idea.

who is he???
'HE' is the great Reinhardt.

google him urself. initially i wanted to put the link here. but i dun want to link any unnecessary virus to my pc.. coz apparently thru linkage that can happen. interesting eh?? so, dun simply link2 sources that you dont really know. u might just link whatever virus that cums with the site. but im no computer genius. so, u computer geeks out there.. correct me where im wrong.

heeeee... ;))

anyway.. back to the main story..

errrr... not sure as to how 'GREAT' this reinhardt guy is - but he suddenly becomes a hot topic amongst all the investors (and non-investors alike) for accurately predicting black monday 2.0.

i tried googling him but all i managed to get are tonnes of discussions or forums about him and his predictions.

what is so amazing about it was how the conspiracy theory managed to connect the dots right to the Catholic Church. ((this is SO beyond me)) - catholic church as in the vatican. or the romans. the opes dei and the templar knight were also briefly mentioned.

or maybe i read it briefly.

******muahhahah******

peningla with all those theories...

but seriously, im not sure how deep does the story goes. its all theory anyway. and yes... if u continue reading... the conspiracy goes right to Revelation. you know.. as in the Bible's Revelation . you Christian out there might familiar with the chapter: Revelation and hear this out... it goes right back to 'End of The World' theory.

almost like the "Left Behind" series minus the dissapearance. (maybe the beginning of it??)

damnnnnn...

like - for real???

***o_O***

totally DAN BROWN material..

and as i was thinking that.. the forum mentioned it as well..
see... so, im not alone in that thought.

im no economist. (hmmmm.... im a "NO" in a lot of things kan...?)

in fact, i did badly in my economic paper. but i do have enough 'economic sense' in me to seek that further information - what happens if the "Great Depression" happens again? how would it effect me being the low income group in this country? do i have to walk to work now that the fuel price is killing my budget (and seeing that i dunno how to cycle)?? do i drink just ice water every time i go out for clubbing or anywhere for that matter? do i just roll pieces of papers now that the ciggie price has increased?? would i be able to afford going back hometown every now and then?? should i go ahead and plan that long awaited holiday next year?? and O.M.G... would i be jobless soon and eventually homeless???

see... alot of question and i truly dont know how this market crash thingy would effect my daily life or me, individually?

hmmm... maybe i shud try my hiro power see if i can come out from everything alive...

{{{{{ (>.<) }}}}} yes. i wud bring all of u with me. hihi. okla - enuf economic talk.

i pening la.

like real only.. hhahha..
economic talk??
my a***

bah.
over and out.

Karma

"What Goes Around - Comes Around"

sometimes i feel like i'm still paying for my old karma back in 'once upon a time' - its kinda tiring. coz at some point of time, i feel like throwing eggs to the sky and say, ENUF PAYMENT ALREADY.

of course, me doing that would not be a good idea, since the eggs will somehow end up on my face. nevermind the fact that the neighbour would start calling the authorities in the process. i mean would u want to turn up infront of many many "man in uniform" covered in eggs? of course the idea of it doesnt seem quite so appealing - at least not infront of our local "man in uniform" anyways.

see - karma.

An inexplicable, unchangeable force coming out of our past, for which we are somehow vaguely responsible and powerless to fight. at least that is the definition i found.

how much payment is enough payment?
am i only paying for the interest all these years?
an eye for eye?

i dont have the answers.
even googling for answers get me nowhere.

"Being fully ethical is possible only for those who realize that all persons are empty, that is, devoid of personhood."

- sK -

Bookworm TAG!!

TAGGED by Nyonyok!! sempat lagi bah dia tag-tag orang.. ish ish.. me not really into this tagging2 thingy.. heeee..

anyhow.. here goes..

Do you remember how you developed a love for reading?

Its in the blood. the kutZ are just all book-nerd BIGGEST time. OK. maybe with one exception.

What are some books you read as a child?

Nodi - enid blyton's - nancy drew's - then migrate to sweet valley high series - sweet dreams series - impian series - mills & boons/harleguin/temptation (behind my mum hah!!) and the rest as they said is history.

What is your favourite genre?

anything will do - EXCEPT horror

Do you have a favourite novel?

at the top of my head now ...... ECLIPSE by Stephenie Meyer... errrr wait.. PARADISE by Judith McNaught..... hmmm.. theres more actually.

Where do you usually read?

everywhere

When do you usually read?

as long as there's new interesting stuff to read.

Do you usually have more than one book you are reading at a time?

every time.

Do you read nonfiction in a different way or place than you read fiction?

any other way of reading - im still thinking of an answer here.........

Do you buy most of the books you read, or borrow them, or check them out of the library?

BUY.

Do you keep most of the books you buy?

of course.

If you have children, what are some of the favorite books you have shared with them? Were they some of the same ones you read as a child?

fairytales. EH???? WAIT!! i dun have children yet.. but those are what i shared with my nephews..

Do you keep a TBR (to be read) list?

yes. see left below.

What’s next?

A Place Called Home by Cecilia Ahern. (P/S Stole it from MK when i was back in KK)

What books would you like to reread?

The Confession of Max Tivolli by Andrew Sean Greer

Who are your favourite authors?

see left - Book Read. i dun really have any particular favourite seeing that most of the authors i usually read ran out of stuff to write - or they die on me - or their imagination doesnt work as it was - so, the sky is the limit.

Hmmmm... mau tag org ka this???

let me see: VSK - she doesnt really read. but i would love to know.

KK trip - last entry

i cant think of anything to write actually. but since i started with day 1, day 2...
i feel obliged to just finish up this blog so i can get on with the next topic.

not that i have any at the moment. but still..

and uploading the pics are not easy. it takes gazilion years and im dreading it now.. coz i had to get up early tomorrow for work and its almost 2am.
im overly over the top tired - physically
and - mentally too - just thinking about the works piling up on my table... agghhhh...

anyways.... here goes..

one of my favourite food in KK.
konlo mein (i failed my spelling bee!)

but the cili in Inanam sucks.. not as pedas as the one in Lintas. both times, couldnt finish.
now i menyesal pulak tidak makan puas-puas. damnnn..

there's a name for this dish (pic below) but i truly cannot recall it. basically, its kaki ayam. never tried it before. but since i took a picture of it, i might as well post it here.

as for the rest of my trip back home - too many pics too little insentive to upload.
if im nice, i might just upload it in FB one fine day.
otherwise, the ones below will just have to do.

since we cant make it for the full moon, the Lai initially wanted to bring us to steamboat (im guessing here hihi). but BBQ won by a landslide.

then..we wanted to do it at the Minintod hill-house.
but, it was raining like nobody's business every day
- even the return trip to ranau was cancelled. cis kejam!!!

so, home it is.

ahhh.. shouldve eaten as much as i can. now, i can only imagine.

these people main booking ni.. i only managed to eat 2 small pieces of lamb chop.
had to actually wait and jaga beside the bbq pit. otherwise, u wont get it.

dunno whether they cukup or not..
too bad dude..

kenyang already. not sure what am i doing here (pic below)..
im guessing not wanting to miss out from any colgate moment.
as always.

playing with baby Caitlyn.

really... dun u just wanna bite her head off??

mum with her 2 grandsons.

okk... cant take it with the uploading any longer.
im too sleepy to even continue with the comments and stuff..

so...... there goes my trip.
it was pleasant - nice - and memorable. i love every part of it. even if i had to wake up early (for holiday standard) everyday and even if i didnt get to eat roti kawin every day..
its almost 3am now. im feeling abit homesick. cant wait for christmas!!!

take care home. love u all more than life itself.

they couldnt say it any better.
gudebai.

A Moment With My Kakiis

KK Trip - Djunction

girls...

they just wanna have fun.

too much of these...

make things go a little bit hazy..

(the crazy sisters)


btw... who is beside Alice?
(above pic - right)

duuuuuii - yohh

"muahhahahah - im sucking off the soul out of everybody..."

trust me... we are normal...

at times.


gonna miss u girls.
:)